Recent marches in our nation's Capitol and around the country this weekend really got under my skin. I originally wrote a rebuke to the modern day feminist movement, but I deleted it. My words were not kind, and my censure was scathingly long. In hindsight, I compressed my original thoughts down to this theme - I cannot support modern day feminists. Historical figures have my gratitude but not the women who call themselves feminist leaders today.
The anger, the greed, the entitlement, the rage against everything - it deeply bothers me.
The berating, the swearing, the middle finger waving, the vulgarity - it offends me.
The praising of violence and destruction of property - it concerns me.
The constant comparing and offense taking over insignificant things - it annoys me.
Today's feminism is not about equality - it's about superiority.
Today's feminism is not about kindness - it's crude.
Today's feminists don't want to be on the same level as men - they want to squash men under their heels (or comfortable ballet flats.)
Instead, I support womanhood.
I would love to someday march for kindness, patience, and trust. The time for gentle strength has not passed. Women will always exert the ability to shape the world. I choose to identify with the influential religious leader who explained womanhood this way
"Femininity is the divine adornment of humanity. It finds expression in your … capacity to love, your spirituality, delicacy, radiance, sensitivity, creativity, charm, graciousness, gentleness, dignity, and quiet strength. It is manifest differently in each girl or woman, but each … possesses it. Femininity is part of your inner beauty.”
Because I am female, it is easier for me to see the good in the world, to trust my ability to be an influence for good in the world, and to teach my children that good exists!
I echo the words of Margaret
D. Nadauld, a previous leader of one of the world's largest organizations
for young women. She counseled:
"The world has enough women who
are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse;
we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women
who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women
of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity;
we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity."
I choose finding joy in womanhood.
I will still change the world.
But I will never be a modern feminist.
I will never march down the streets, screaming profanities, and hypocritically calling for peace while inciting outrage. I will not choose to be offended at every turn. I will not throw a toddler-like temper tantrum because I don't get my way. I hope to never be a nasty woman. Instead, I will find fulfillment in womanhood, with all its beautiful gifts of intuition, kindness, patience, sensitivity, and gentle persuasion.
The world is full of humans, and so it will never be perfect. But there are better ways to feed the hungry, empower the downtrodden, and raise our spirits than to embrace the prejudiced feminist movement of victim-hood. I can teach tolerance in my home. I can share my blessings with others. I can raise my children to show love and generosity. I can seek out the lovely aspects of our world and celebrate that goodness.
To modern day feminists, I implore - don't make me ashamed to be a woman. Your rage does not define me, and your anger will not fulfill you. Let it go, and come back to the table as compassionate adults, not whiny toddlers. That's how we save the world. That's true woman power.
Labels: Emotional Health, Happy Tidbits