Step Away from the Grievance Industry

Complaints and whining

Disgruntleness. Anger. Offense Taken.

And I'm not talking about raising toddlers - I'm talking about adults.
Adults who are sucked into the "grievance industry" as my husband calls it.

It doesn't matter how benign or small or ridiculous the issue, people will rally around a cause and waste their emotion getting worked up in the grievance industry. Fires of ill-content spread through social media, inciting anger that benefits nothing. In my opinion, there are many worthwhile causes to engage your time and emotion, such as world hunger, addiction recovery, and ending human trafficking. Compared to those heartbreaking causes, the following exhibits seem trite and superficial.


Exhibit A:

Apparently pockets on pants are sexist. Did you know that? Do the past years of your life suddenly make sense knowing pockets are a slap in the face to women by powerful men in fashion? Guys can fit their keys, wallet, and phone in a pocket, but "a woman . . . has to either carry those items in her hand, or bring a whole purse with her—a definitive, silent sign that she is a woman." How is looking like a woman a bad thing? Besides, every girl I know carries more than just a wallet, keys, and phone! Lipstick, a brush, extra makeup, a hair tie, gum - not to mention the mom essentials of diapers and wipes. Small pant pockets should be the least of a girl's concern, and blaming the fashion industry for their apparent sexism that keeps women in shackles seems an overreach. To complain about designers focusing on how clothing drapes the body, rather than on function, is like blaming cake for having calories. Instead of raving for #pocketequality, buy some different pants. Or a sewing machine to make your own pants. Or just happily carry a purse. Just get over the illusion that the world is out to secretly destroy your happiness by denying you huge pockets.

Exhibit B:

Victoria's Secret came out with a new bra with no padding. Now people are huffing that they are "establishing a cultural beauty standard that is deeply exclusionary." Supposedly not everybody looks great in that bra type. But why should every body wear the same bra? Aren't a variety of options a good thing? Just because someone's body size or curve measurements mean they can wear a non-padded bra does not mean your body type is less desirable. Stop being angry, and just wear the bra that you feel good wearing. A bra is supposed to be under your clothes anyways, so why is this mainstream news? Please put this exaggerated outrage under wraps too.


This is how the the grievance industry grows. Somewhere, someone will find something to be upset about, and social media helps them fuel the fire. I'm sure I could continue pointing out examples of ridiculous and unnecessary outrage, but this blog is meant to help people find joy in life, and I don't want to feel frustrated by society's awkward love of being offended any more today.
So, I'll leave you with my advice: To find joy in life, let go of ridiculous outrage. Leave the grievance society, and spend your energy forming a grateful and service oriented heart. Count your blessings, not your grievances. Show caring actions to the people around you. Stop complaining on Twitter and Tumblr, and start helping organizations improve people's lives (find a place to volunteer at You and the world will be better off.

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