Joyful Family Life: Guest Post

Nikki is a wife to a loving husband, a mother to a lovely and bright little girl, a lifestyle blogger, and an aspiring beauty guru. You can find out more on her blog http://whatzbuzzin.com.

How is your relationship with your child/children? How much time do you spend to just sit and talk to them about their day? Do you make it a point to spend the weekends playing and hanging out with them?

These are some of the questions I asked myself when I was still working. Whenever I dropped my daughter off at daycare, I felt heartbroken. I’m sure all of us parents felt the same way at some point. It was so hard for me to leave her there knowing I wouldn't see her until 5:00! The pain was so excruciating that I had to quit my job and become a stay at home mom. That’s when I learned that having a relationship with your kids is very important.

I was raised by a single mom. So it was just me and my mother for about 22 years. Like other parents, she sheltered me all those years. I remember going to the mall with her and just spending time, bonding and talking about stuff. We didn’t have much but it didn’t matter, because as long as we were together we were happy. I had a great relationship with my mother, and now we still have that unbreakable bond. We fight like normal mothers and daughters, and we argue, but at the end of the day it’s the relationship we built for the past 22 years that keeps us together. This is the kind of relationship I want to have with my daughter. A bond that will last for all lifetime.

As a stay at home mom, I have all the free time to make sure she gets the learning she needs. Even though she doesn’t go to daycare yet, I intend to at least teach her the basics. With learning comes fun and play. Below are some things I do to help my daughter learn and also to build a relationship with her.

When I woke up this morning, I decided to make a “play corner” for Cassie. So I rearranged my living room. Seen in the picture are some of Cassie’s toys. As you can see we have a theme going on. The Disney princess table is a set that I bought from a garage sale. The Disney Princess Magic Rise Kitchen Playset and Disney Princess Magic Rise Enchanted Oven are bought from Craigslist by her Grammy just yesterday. The personalized purple toy bin in the corner was made by her God Mother. She didn’t have a play area before but after seeing her play with her kitchen last night (and Grammy almost had an accident because of her toys), I decided to do this. Now she has her own area to play and just enjoy.

Cassie loves to draw, write and color. So we make it a point to do things that she loves to do. Lately, I have been teaching her the numbers 11-20 since she knows how to count from 1-10. I also bought these alphabet and number posters from the Dollar Store and posted it on her room wall. I remember that’s how I learned since I could see the posters everyday.

I don’t like Math, but I don’t let it stop me from teaching my child the opposite. Learning with them not only makes it a special bonding time, but the life teachings will eventually pay off.

For some parents, reading before bedtime is a huge part of their nightly routine. Reading allows your child to have great vocabulary, but it also a perfect way to bond, especially for working parents. Don’t complain when they ask you to read “The Little Mermaid” for the thousandth time, it just means they love hearing your voice read their favorite book.

Do they want you to wear silly costumes? Does your daughter want you to wear tiaras? (Yes Dads, I’m asking you.) Do they ask you to hula hoop? Then do it! Being silly as a parent means more than you can imagine to your child. I’m sure that when we were kids we asked our parents to do silly things, and we loved it! Acting immature once in a while with your kids makes a great bond. So if your kid asks you to slide down a very narrow slide with her, even if you end up getting stuck in the middle, do it. And yes, that was based on experience.

Now this is a “no brainer." We went to Disneyland this year, and it was a lot of fun. Cassie was able to see her favorite Disney Princesses. Going on a vacation doesn’t have to involve riding airplanes. You can go on road trips, visit other cities, or even go camping. This is another way to bond and get away from your normal routine.

Sit down on the floor, and play with their toys with them. Chase them around the house, play peek-a-boo, build a fort, or play dress up. Playing with them builds one of the greatest bonds because it lets them feel that you are interested in what they do. They will cherish these moments forever.

These questions are great conversation starters. It’s a way of them telling you how their day went. This is also a good way to let your kids feel that you are interested. I also learned that by doing this, you also know if your kid is being bullied.

Every parent has different ways of building a relationship with their kids. It doesn’t matter if you are a stay at home parent or a working parent, spending time with your kids every day won’t hurt. As the saying goes, every second counts.

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